Snazzified

The title of this article doesn’t quite capture the tone and message of this article by journalist Andrea Grimes, a Dallas native. The “mess with Texas” part seems to imply that she wants to negatively act upon the state, yet the article is all about a self-deprecating yet deep love for her home state.

I’m not a Texas native by any means, but in the past year I’ve experienced a feeling akin to being pushed back into the feminist closet. Where I come from in the Northeast, it was perfectly acceptable to voice one’s proclivity towards feminism and liberalism. Now that I live in Texas, I’m only comfortable fully leaving the comfort of my feminist closet when I’m visiting Austin. Otherwise, I linger in the doorway; ready to jump in and shut the door fast in defense.

This is why Grimes’ article really touched me. It’s nice to be reminded that there are others like me *gasp* in this great big state and that although we might be fighting a losing cause, at least we’re doing something. I particularly loved when she wrote,

I am not trying to show off the feminist cross I am forced to carry uphill both ways in 115-degree summers, all the while crying jalapeno tears because I touched my eyes after I made salsa.

Way to capture Texas in that one simple sentence! But aside from the humorous writing, I believe Grimes makes a great point about loving where you come from while also working to effect change. Despite the large obstacles, we should all be working towards the betterment of our home communities for all.

jgh2:

“
Now that I’ve sufficiently demolished the case for changing one’s name, which I must confess, I find to be a very flimsy case indeed, here’s the case for keeping one’s name. It’s a sign of autonomy in a world where women are still regarded as inferior and are expected to defer to their husbands. It requires that you do no paperwork. It requires that you make no announcements about your new name, or that you ever have to visit the Social Security Administration related to your name. Your old friends will still be able to find you. All the work that you’ve already done under your name will continue to be identified with your current self. You will be, in your small way, working to change the culture of male-dominated families and male-dominated societies. Even those dreaded questions, that people will ask you, will give you an opportunity to present a different model and advance the cause of gender equality.”

Apologies if this sounds a bit cynical, but when I read diatribes like these that essentially force one feminist’s view on the rest of us, it really, really bothers me. It fails to take into account the multitude of perspectives that exist, and the choices that women make based on their own individual contexts. One size fits all doesn’t work in feminism, nor does it seem to work in life as a whole.

What really tickles me is the last line of this post,

Plus, you’ll be kind of an iconoclast, until everyone else starts doing it. And who wants to follow tradition? Come on, we all know tradition sucks.

Is it just me, or does this sound an awful lot like a person justifying her own decisions to take part in patriarchal traditions (i.e. marriage) while shutting down others’ decisions on whether or not they want to take part in others? In the scheme of things, I personally believe that the institution or marriage is in itself a far more problematic legacy of patriarchy than the name change that may follow.

This post wouldn’t have bothered me had it been presented as one woman’s decision regarding her name after marriage. I fully respect a person’s right to change or keep their name in whatever situation. But I do take issue with someone trying to impose her belief on me in a way that comes off as a holier-than-thou mockery of my personal decision.

Intellectual debate doesn’t stem from put-downs; it comes from mutually respectful dialogue.